Thoughts on Bullying Bookmark and Share

Posted in Philosophy of Education on Jan 19, 2010 - 07:55 PM

Recently I listened to a discussion on the Diane Rehm show that centered on bullying in school and showcased some of Carl Pickhardt's theory on why bullying takes place and how it is possible. It was fascinating. You can listen to this segment here.

In public school, it is wrong to bully. Often times when a bully is discovered in a class of children, there will be some sort of sit-down talk. The bully might be told that it is not okay to do what he or she is doing to other children, and that if bullying is being used to achieve some goal, then there are surely other ways one can go about meeting that goal without harming others. Most times some sort of further repercussion is dealt to the bully as well.

Anyhow, during the show a man called in and spoke about how he feels that in our nation's society, bullying and teasing are used daily as a means to achieve certain goals. He discussed how it is no surprise that our children are resulting to bullying when such a practice is being deployed by adults all around us day by day. Whether in politics, competitive business, or even having the coolest Christmas lights on the block, bullying does seem rather abundant in and outside the schoolyard by adults and children alike.

But what do you think? Does it seem rather obvious that the people of our nation use bullying, teasing, and other forms of lowering other peoples stature to meet certain ends?

Is it ever okay to use bullying to put oneself at a better place?

Is there a connection between the current atmosphere of our nation and the bullying that takes place between our youth in schools?

Personally, I feel that bullying is not an appropriate route to take in order to further one's well being. No matter how different people are, nor at what rate of speed people catch on or complete tasks, I believe that a cooperative community where individuals' strengths and weaknesses are embraced and used as a collective effort to meet certain ends is most appropriate. Although sometimes taking a route where everyone is treated fairly and listened to respectfully may take longer than other options, nobody gets left out. It is more likely that everyone will feel included in the effort that was made to complete whatever task was at hand, and thus is more likely to walk away satisfied and feeling like they had an important role in getting from point A to B. And to me, a society of people who feel satisfied about the things that they do, especially when working cooperatively, is a society I envision as favorable.

I do think that bullying is a common practice in our nation, by adults and children. I also think that there is a strong connection between the atmosphere of our nation and the bullying that takes place in schools. There seems to be a lot of contradictory lessons between what is taught in school -- that is, that bullying is unacceptable -- and the lessons that are readily available through television, magazines, and the Internet. These models of bullying affect not only the children, but the adults as well. If people learn in school that bullying is wrong but regularly see it celebrated all around them, whom are they to believe?

Your thoughts would be a pleasure to read, if you feel like sharing.


Tags for this entry:
youth-adult relationships, bullying, behavior and consequences, cooperation, carl pickhardt



Comments

Mary Pat Champeau

Jan 19, 2010 - 11:54 PM

Hi Shawn: Thanks for taking on this important topic so thoughtfully. I really enjoyed your post and agree with you completely: children do not come by bullying accidentally. As a nation and a culture, we model it for them using every venue available (including schools) and then we are shocked when they pick on each other! In schools, we grade and test them relentlessly (often starting in kindergarten) which cannot help but splinter whatever community feeling they enter school with because we immediately turn their new friends into adversaries. We put pressure on them to succeed at the expense of others rather than for the good of others (grading on a curve, art contests, poorly-managed competitive sports programs for kids etc) sending the message that competition is the key to success and in order for there to be one winner, there must be at least one loser. I think we all know the media’s role in cultivating a culture which glamorizes violence and encourages children to be rabid consumers rather than informed citizens, but to me there are two areas which really stand out in this issue. The first is the fact that we still celebrate Columbus Day (ultimate bully!) and actually teach the story of Christopher Columbus’ life to children as if he were a hero, despite his legacy of brutality, enslavement and genocide. Isn’t it time to find a new historical hero for our school-age children? The second is the merciless way we treat animals: eating them, wearing them, experimenting on them, using them for our entertainment, buying and selling them, condemning most animals on the Earth to lives of misery at our hands. And then we tell children to be nice to animals, and not to hurt them? What kind of conflict does it create in the soul of young child to realize that he can eat a chicken but not kick a dog? What makes the dog more deserving of mercy?

As the Greeks said, what is cultivated in a society, will grow. As adults, we need to take a good hard look at what we are cultivating in our society. Your blog helps!!
Thanks again.

Shawn Strader

Jan 20, 2010 - 04:20 PM

Well golly Mary. Thank you so much for sending back such a detailed, thoughtful and wonderfully accurate response. Your words do much justice to the topic at hand, and are very eye opening.

I cannot agree more in regards to our nation’s celebration of Christopher Columbus Day. It is a tragedy that we celebrate such a mans legacy. As you said, that we represent Columbus as a hero, someone to look up to, an icon, in our public schools is very puzzling, devastating, and unfortunate in a grand way. I have voiced my personal concern to that issue in many conversations, and have questioned why it is that we do not also teach our children of the people who suffered, who died, whose lives we took in order to claim some sort of ownership of the land which is now the U.S.A. It most definitely is time for a new historical hero that our children can look up to. Someone who is worthy of respect and honor.

Your words on animal enslavement and consumption need no further words. You’ve articulated and displayed the animal issue in our nation with such grace. Thank you.

Topics such as those you bring up, among many others, are a heavy issue. We represent certain ideas and lifestyles in the media that are so contradictory to the way we want our children to learn to be. We have such great intentions of raising children to be conscious of what goes on around them, and moral beings, but we are just doing it the wrong way.

We must create an environment in and outside of school that maintains a consistency with what children are being taught in school, and the lessons and lifestyles that exist in our outside-of-school lives. Otherwise, how can we expect our children to grow and understand the valuable lessons we would like for them the learn, as well as live them out?

Mary Pat Champeau

Jan 20, 2010 - 05:19 PM

Thanks, Shawn—I agree. We cannot teach something that we don’t know ourselves, and we need to stop punishing children for behaving in ways that reflect the cultural messaging they’ve received! I guess I feel very optimistic that as our consciousness begins to shift in the direction of more democratic ways of looking at important social issues, democratic schools will follow. What we teach stems directly from what we value whether we realize it or not, as you so aptly point out. I look forward to reading more posts!

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Shawn Strader

Tempe, Arizona





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